She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
