I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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