Non-Jews are for practice
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Randomize
