just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
