when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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