Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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