i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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