my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
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