There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
You did what with his pubic hair?
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