i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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