No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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