You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
