I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
