I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Randomize
