awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Randomize
