Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Randomize
