2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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