It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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