Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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