Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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