Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
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