Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
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