Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Randomize
