It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
