Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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