2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
thus making me awesome and them whores
Fuck appropriateness.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
