Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
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