everyone is single if you try hard enough
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
