just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
