we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Define "chronic" masturbator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
only if we run a train.
done.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
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