I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Randomize
