Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
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