Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
