That's intense
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
So many bounce houses so little time
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
