Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
