I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
