Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Randomize
