No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
