I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
