OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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