fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
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She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
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you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
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