I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize