Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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