I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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