She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
