The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
