I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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