GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Randomize