haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
whose parrot is this?
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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