I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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