Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
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