I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
